The First Live Concert of the...SPICE GUNDAMS!
by Shinigami no Aiwa
Summary: I am insane. That's it. PG-13 for yaoi, language, and EXTREME innuendo. Err...I don't own the Spice Girls or the GW bishies...but their outfits in here are original Aiwa design! Neither do I own SpandexSpace, by the way.


I get inspiration from the weirdest things...  
  
THE FIRST LIVE CONCERT...OF THE SPICE GUNDAMS!  
  
Aiwa:Welcome to...the first live concert of...THE SPICE GUNDAMS!  
  
Aiwa: Here they come, out on their catwalk...first is...Killer Spice, Heero Yuy!  
  
:: Heero is clad from head to toe in a body-hugging catsuit, made of leopard-print spandex. Much drooling occurs in the audience, from both male and female mouths.. ::  
  
Heero: Omae o korosu, Aiwa. Omae o korosu. And I MEAN it this time!  
  
Aiwa: Next we have...Shinigami Spice, Duo Maxwell!  
  
:: As he walks out, blowing kisses to his audience, several jaws drop...MANY jaws drop...at his...abbrieviated leather costume, which contains maybe enough fabric to make a couple table napkins.::  
  
Duo: :: winks at Heero, who's staring at him with naked lust in his eyes:: You're so CUTE when you threaten to kill people!  
  
Heero: duh-duh-duh-duh...:: it appears his brain has gone into overload. ::  
  
Aiwa, who is openly drooling:: Mmm....right in the middle, we have Circus Spice, Trowa Barton!  
  
:: Out he steps, dressed in tight silver hot pants and a silver top that fits like a second skin. His hair, as always, covers one eye, but the other eye adequately sums up the amount of humiliation he is feeling.::  
  
Trowa: ...  
  
:: All the Trowa fans fall over, and nosebleeds begin to erupt::  
  
Anonymous Trowa Fan #1: He's so eloquent!  
  
Anonymous Trowa Fan #2: Who cares about that?! He's HOT!  
  
Trowa: ...  
  
Aiwa: :: clearing her throat:: m If I have to keep being their announcer like this and seeing them in those outfits one day I'll drug them all and take them to Hawaii...  
:: bright and chipper again:: Okay! Next to last, we have...the angelic...Angel Spice, Quatre Winner!  
  
:: Quatre walks out, blushing bright pink...to compliment the cute pink string bikini top...bikini top? and...thong?::  
  
Quatre: ... this is a nightmare...  
  
Aiwa: Well, Angel, not for the audience. Last of all, we have...Chang Wufei, DragonSpice!  
  
:: Propelled onto the stage by a shove, Wuffie stumbles out... wearing an actual DRESS, red with spaghetti straps and a dragon emblazoned across the front::  
  
Wuffie: Injustice...injustice...injustice... *twitch*  
  
  
Aiwa: And NOWWW...time for the concert!  
  
:: The shellshocked Gundam boys line up in a crazily crooked semblance of order, Heero and Duo sending supposedly hidden lust-filled glances at each other while Quatre and Trowa don't even try to hide it. Wufei is having enough trouble trying to control his nosebleed...and none of them are singing. ::  
  
Aiwa: :: threatening rumble:: SING....damnit...  
  
Trowa: ...  
  
Aiwa: :: getting desperate:: Listen. If you sing for me, and sing good, AND RIGHT NOW, I'll get three presidential suites for you five, and Wufei, you can invite over whoever you want!  
  
Duo: Well, when you put it like THAT... :: he poses:: SPICE GUNDAM BOYS, TO THE MICROPHONES!  
  
:: They proceed to perform a small selection of their most popular works, including, " If you wanna fly my Gundam", " One Beats up Two"- with Duo and Heero's extra special performance- " The Lady isn't a Lady"- featuring Wufei, a flashing episode, a lot of nosebleeds and a lack of underwear; and their finale, " Spice up your Gundam!" with home decorating tips from Martha Stewart. ::  
  
Unnamed Camera Operation, aka Aiwa's Minion: :: films away, even after the concert is over...for a post-concert shot of the stars!::   
  
Aiwa: Now was that so hard? :: smirking, as a satisfied, dazed, lustful and crazy crowd lurches out of the concert hall::  
  
Duo: :: looks down at his leather high heeled boots:: Someone's nose bled on me...you're paying for it, Aiwa.  
And...where are those suites? ~ God, I love Spandex.~ :: eyes Heero with a grin::  
  
Wufei: Injustice...*twitch* ...but where ARE those suites?  
  
Trowa: ... ( Interpretation for those unable to read TrowaDot language: You do know an angry clown is dangerous, right? )  
  
Quatre: :: clinging to Trowa like a beautiful cross-dressing leech:: You can even charge it to MY account, just get us there!  
  
Heero: Hn.   
  
Aiwa: :: shrugs and tosses them the keys:: See? I wasn't lying for once...~ and by god do I hope no one realizes those are car keys...~ Get in your bus and direct the driver to the Four Seasons...now...:: edges away...slowly...:: I need to g-  
  
:: Heero, who has caught the keys and examined them, tosses them aside and interrupts her::   
  
Heero: Those are copies of a car key. All the same. Aiwa, Omae o korosu...:: He removes a gun from his veritable universe of SpandexSpace and advances, with a murderous look::   
  
Duo: and since all of our outfits contain SOME spandex...  
  
Wufei: ...we all have Spandex space...:: making sure to look at Aiwa, instead of the other pilots; he ran out of tissues for his nosebleeds::  
  
Trowa: .... ( Translation: and we all have weapons in it. )  
  
Aiwa: Oh she-  
  
:: I am sorry, but video feed has been lost for this live transmission of the Spice Gundam concert due to technical difficulties...::  
  
~ Owari~  
  
  
  
  
  
  



End file.
